First, there is NO correct time to "get over" your grief. The so called societal one year limit is preposterous.  In former times and cultures,women obeyed the prevailing custom of wearing black until the first year was officially over. They withdrew from society and basically "died" along with the deceased. Now we have work mandates. Three days off for the death of a loved one and back to work again! Three days!!

There is nothing more earth shattering than finding that your relationship and partner are not what you thought they were.  Loss of trust on the one hand, and guilt on the other, are the primary painful feelings in this situation. Healing from infidelity is one of the most challenging issues a couple must face. But, as they say, conflict is growth waiting to happen.

"You shouldn’t feel that way!"  Really? Why not? So often parents or partners are annoyed by your feelings, which only makes you feel worse. They are discounting your emotions because they don’t want to deal with the issue at hand.